It seems to be never-ending...

So I spent the entire morning searching and applying for jobs. I have two weeks of unemployment left and no leads. I have this strange feeling I'm going to end up at a fast food place - and if I do, oh well... at least I will be making an effort to support my family. The only problem I see with it may be that we just saved the house and now I'm not going to have an income to keep it. I'm sure it will work out, it always does.

Tomorrow I have an appointment to meet with the school about Rowdy. I don't know what I'm going to do with that kid. I'm almost to the point of letting him be admitted to Primary Children's Hospital for observation and diagnosis. I know it will be hard for him because of his age, but in the long run it will help. We can't find anyone to see him because they aren't taking new patients or they require payment up front and then we have to be reimbursed from the insurance company. Hello - we have a letter from the insurance company stating they guarantee full payment for many visits. Shouldn't that be enough to get help for a child who needs it? And in this day and age, who has the money to pay for visits up front when they cost $200+ just for the doctor to see them for an evaluation? By admitting him we will be in contact with a physician that can help him and will not require prepayment, and our insurance will pay 100% for the hospital visit - but to what emotional damage to my child? Is this really the only option I have?

I find it ridiculous that in this state you cannot get help for mental/behavioral disorders unless you have a low enough income that you can get a medicaid card or a high enough income that you can prepay everything... what about the lower-middle class that is neither? Should the people just be cast to the side until they do something severe enough to end up in the correctional system where they have to be "rehabilitated"? All I want is help for my child and it seems to be impossible to get at this point. So I send emails and make phone calls and search the internet for resources daily that could lead to helping a 7 year old with behavioral/mental disorders... and I haven't found much in northern Utah. If we still lived in central Illinois there would be more than enough routes to explore. But in the prozac capital of the United States where people are told to hide their problems and pretend like nothing is wrong there are few resources available.

Will I be able to find help for my child before it's too late? Every day without help is leading him down a path that he shouldn't have to travel. It is possible to help him - he's still young... but will others help him that have the resources to do it? So far no - at least not in this area of the country we live in.

If only I could find a job or two to cover medical costs and get things started.

Until next time...